- Libra (zodiacsociety)
Love it has no guarantees, Which muse will lay its hands on me, We said the words, we knocked on wood, And I’m still here waiting to see what could be, What if the closest I get to the moment is now?
I often get comfortable with this thought that the next day, or minute it could all just end without warning, or explanation but at the same time I’ll hopelessly let my mind race off into a million thoughts of what we’ll do in the tomorrow. Like going places, discussing ideas or stupid things, have entire conversations about my random thoughts, our future, the life we would live and I let it consume me so much that I forget that none of it is even close happening. That after it’s all said and done, that I’ll be here with the preconceived thoughts and memories and that’s as close as I’ll ever get to that reality. All the effort to get so close but to be so far. It gets depressing and I become so self defeating that the next time I feel like this I often think, “what’s the point of trying, if they already want to be with me there’s no need, if they don’t then it’s all for not” not that I’m looking for something effortless but the thought that I could be wasting my time and only causing someone awkward discomfort and thinking that I’m creepy is terrifying. So I’m at a fork in the road on what to do if this is the closest I get. Do I accept it and move on, having to snuff the flame in my heart, or do I continue and risk only having it all fall apart. Balance is key but it’s difficult to assess when your thoughts are clouded with emotions